Female Rivalry: A Deep-Rooted Issue
Memórias eternas, sorrisos e abraços calorosos.
Who hasn't felt diminished or inferior due to mean-spirited comments or actions from other women? Anyone who denies it is probably lying.
But is this rivalry inherent to the female sex, or is it society that often misrepresents what truly happens between women?
From a young age, we're encouraged to compete with each other. Even in classic teen movies, there's always the "mean girls" clique, clearly fostering these rivalrous behaviours.
I believe the root of the problem lies in a society that pressures us to conform to specific beauty standards. Society still forces us to compete in every aspect of life, intensely and aggressively. Inevitably, feelings of comparison and rivalry remain prevalent among women.
In a New York Times article, Emily V. Gordon explores the scientific underpinnings of female competition, shedding light on two theories that attempt to explain this complex behaviour.
The first theory turns to evolutionary psychology, a field that seeks to understand our current behaviours through the lens of natural selection. According to this perspective, competition among women arose as an ancestral strategy for protection against physical harm. Indirect aggression, in this context, served as a mechanism to ensure personal safety while diminishing the perceived value of other women as reproductive rivals.
Some research in this area suggests that women, in the distant past, needed to secure access to the "best genetic material" to ensure the survival of the species. This pursuit of high-quality reproductive partners would have shaped, over thousands of years, a competitive behaviour among women.
However, Gordon emphasizes that these concerns no longer apply in the same way to the modern world. Women today don't need to compete for genetic resources in the same way as their ancestors. Nevertheless, female competitiveness persists, taking on more subtle and "private" forms, such as social comparison and indirect criticism.
It's important to remember that competition between women is not a universal or invariably negative phenomenon. Healthy rivalry can drive individual and collective growth. However, when this competition becomes toxic and harmful, it's crucial to understand its roots and find solutions to foster a more collaborative and positive environment among women.
Gordon's article serves as a starting point for exploring the nuances of female competition. By understanding the scientific theories and historical context, we can unravel the mysteries of this complex behavior and work to build a future where women support and collaborate with each other, rather than competing against one another.
My Personal Testimony
Throughout my career, I've encountered various situations, but the presence of female rivalry has always been constant.
Unfortunately, I've seen it all. From malicious and spiteful comments about colleagues' appearance or style to subtle sabotage in team projects, or even mere insinuations that often have no basis in reality.
My company opened an internal recruitment for a specific position a few years ago. Due to my ambitions to change jobs, acquire new skills, and increase my salary, I applied. After two weeks, I was selected to fill the position. Days later, I heard some unpleasant comments from other women, with insinuations that I was chosen because the department boss was my "godmother" and because I was her "golden girl" among the other candidates.
At the time, I felt deeply hurt and frustrated. However, I did not let myself be discouraged. I recognize my abilities and have always been convinced that I was qualified for the position for which I applied. Fortunately, I had the support of my department colleagues who always supported me in all my doubts and work-related questions.
Over time, I learned to deal with female rivalry in the workplace more assertively. I started to focus on my work, avoiding gossip and negative comments. I also began to build supportive relationships with other women, recognizing that together we are stronger and can achieve great things.
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